Responding to viewers' love: a grown-up child, and haters as a measure of impact

so many questions to ask but i'll take this opportunity and much love for the super chat to say without you i wouldn't be muslim today i can't thank you enough just don't stop gio yeah geogeo honestly i you know i i honestly i don't have words really for your appreciation um it's it's a blessing that's all i can say and i and i don't you know i know to people to some people i mean i can understand why they may

think that because they're just so toxic but to some people they may think i'm just you know i don't know like i'm pretending being fake or um but i'm legitimately saying that look i honestly don't you know when when i say things like i don't feel i mean twofold one that i don't feel that i necess at all really deserve just everything like this whole thing i i i genuinely don't like i do think like i'm being legitimate it's not that

i okay it's not that i think i'm not talented or it's that i don't think i'm intelligent or i do i'm not gonna lie i do i recognize these things about myself but i don't see myself like as talented as as being able to touch the hearts of so many people and i don't honestly i still see myself okay this is real talk now yeah i see myself as a

you know very still um i don't know like uh it's hard to explain but you see i see myself sometimes like you know with my humor and my stuff as almost just like like a child but a grown-up child this sounds i don't know if that makes any sense to people like when i was a kid and i would think of an adult like let's say i would see people who are 40 years old or forget 40 even

in their 30s i had i saw people who i pictured as oh they're grown-ups now that i'm of that age i don't still see myself like that i see myself as obviously of that age but just almost like a child but a man a man it's weird honestly i can't explain it but but i do see other people like that as as very grown up and and this is why i get really you know when i like on my mind traps like connect with professors and people

i see them as very kind of grown up like very kind of adult like just like how i pictured grown-ups to be when i was a kid so and i'm really surprised how you know the amount of respect and and even the kind of keenness they have for me and just people in general as well because i think to myself no way seriously like i i picture people to be so serious and i picture them to think what the hell is this guy always joking and laughing and surely they can't

but but wow you know but they genuinely do they they and that really every time it surprises me people think i'm just acting but i'm not i'm i'm really i'm like whoa serious wow do you seriously um see me in such light and so so shook him honestly really deeply from my heart i the other thing i wanted to say when i said this is twofold is that even though i'm obviously

i'm i'm online i'm doing everything but i really only get a snapshot as a snapshot of maybe the waves that my thought may be making is that it's through my haters as weird as this sounds because you see to me i think hmm you know like okay i'm there let's say i'm making my videos i'm doing my stuff but the amount of people that not only get rattled sometimes but they become obsessed

you see that reflects a sense of threat to their worldview to the and i'm just an individual i'm not an you know a sect i'm not a denomination i'm not a um you know like i'm just an individual so for me to be able to really i don't know petrify these people to that extent that they become obsessed i mean sects groups organizations i mean they put their time effort money

to just becoming preoccupied with me that really gives me a realization at times that damn that these people must you know they must see me as something so huge to that they need to kind of uh i don't know they need to extinguish whatever it is i'm saying so yeah wow i mean i i do at times you know it's like i've read once who was it it was actually a um that was from the world war um times where it was a jewish i think he was a jewish

scientist or something but he's he said that he was speaking about the kind of anti-jewish propaganda and he was saying well you know we haven't really produced enough and but he said whenever i really want to see like i want to understand maybe just get a boost self-esteem boost he said i just read all the propaganda against jewish people because he's like they're taking over the world they're doing this they're doing that they're controlling the systems and and that's um yeah so and then i see all this love from you guys and really it does honestly drowns me it drowns me in