A good suitor but he/she doesn't pray, is that a deal breaker? - Mufti Abu Layth al-Maliki

right I'd been asked a question about relationships God so throw on relationships and somebody has asked that look they found a suitor which is let's say appropriate or who they like so this girl has found somebody who she likes so she likes this guy but he doesn't really pray is that an issue should she turn

that down for somebody who does pray right and we've just got Indra true tuning in there all the way from Indonesia by the way I've had some messages from Indonesia all the people tuning in the much love to all of you in sugar and barnacle efika maha yeah cool right so just thought I'd give a random shout out there but look this question of relationships if you found a spouse but he doesn't pray or she doesn't pray should this be a deal-breaker now that's

interesting because look I I don't know I think this depends because it's in true hmm what does it mean to be religious that's the the question you see because in the hadith when the Prophet said people are married for beauty and wealth and status and so on but be victorious with the one of being you see Dean in that day and age meant Dean with character as well it meant having like this human character to you

today it doesn't mean that so I'm not sure what people mean when they say religious you know if somebody's religious because if religious means religion is important in your life as in it plays an important role in your life because I could look you have to take myself as an example to many people I I'm definitely not religious too many people depends on your understanding of religion you see to me if I take the understanding that

religion plays a huge role in my life then that's then I'm very undeploy religious Islam plays a massive role in my life but how it plays a role is very different in my life that plays a role in in its in its teachings in the curiosity it arouses in me in the guidance in the wisdom it bestows in its kind of infinite search perpetual searches sends me on in the in the kind

of way that it adapts to all times and places this is how Islam kind of totally overwhelms me so yes in that sense I would consider myself to be very deeply religious if that's what being really just means if being religious means you always praying or you're worshipping a lot and stuff like this then I doubt all I will be from that category of being seen as very religious or you are contained you know you love ceremonies and ritual in and so it depends what religious

means to people so I would say that look it depends on what this if that is important to you what that person is to me as a person personally being a good human being yes look I'm a Muslim so if I was to marry somebody then being a Muslim would be very important to me and that's the same with most Muslims everywhere and that's understandable do they have to be praying do they have to be praying now praying is important to me that they

pray the daily prayers but to me that they are a decent human being would probably weigh heavier than just the fact that they have rituals but then are very kind of arrogant or something more that they don't have good character so to me character would over way certain things all those the fact that they pray is very important but for example you get people who pray but they kind of weird their coltish I couldn't I can't stand people like that I mean I couldn't personally stand somebody that would want to tell thee about praying

and tell me about doing stuff like this so I don't know this is a personal question that each person has to answer so I would say that look it I don't feel personally that you it that it has to be a deal breaker I would say that I don't think you are sinful in any way for choosing somebody that doesn't pray I don't think so as long as they're a decent human being but I'm not saying you need to choose that person it's entirely up to you who you choose okay they should click they should be some obviously shared values they should be some understanding and everybody's different so that's my

advice on people who are seeking kind of suitable suitors that how should they be should they be into what I'm into and sometimes they don't need to be totally into what you're into because that's us does your head and religion once again it's different to all people to me religion is a very private affair I would never I wouldn't I don't instruct people around me to pray for example I don't like people I would never instruct my wife or instruction we say oh you haven't prayed the hard get up and pray that I would never do that

I wouldn't even I mean it's just that's the kind of person I am because I believe that if I tell somebody to pray imagine in their heart they get this kind of feeling that well I was going to but now why should I do it because you Tomita and because of that you they may choose not to pray and I get the fact that look in the Quran there is the verse addressing the Prophet what more allocable Salah was stubborn alia command your family but that's to the

Prophet because he would have done it in the best of ways me if I tell somebody to pray or probably just annoy them so I ain't gonna do that so that's me so I think this is a it's it's up to each person how they choose to but I don't think you need to feel guilty at the same time I do think Islamic values are important if they were important to you they should be some shared kind of values they should be that prayer should be important but if a person prays five times a day if they let's say they're

missing their prayers or they they're struggling with that or they I don't know I mean it's your call so that's what I would say