Keeping Calm Lessons From The Quran On Anger & Forgiveness | Mufti Abu Layth

now this is a verse that's so incredibly important okay surah al-imran 134 i would say go over it read it commit it to memory okay now this verse begins with one of the most important features of being a human being honestly you know some people ask me what is the purpose somebody asked me the other day what is the purpose of of us what is the purpose of insane i said well see one is to find him or herself

but along the way to serve others that is the purpose and when you do find yourself and i was talking about that consciousness development you will find god it is this is what the famous sufi is saying as well and and people attribute it as a hadith although it's not a authentic hadith but it's a saying that men are nafsa whosoever knows themselves knows god and in the ancient you know the the temple um at mount olympus or in the ancient legends that it said know thyself

so right so you see the first thing people who spend this isn't just speaking this this spending isn't speaking about people who spend on themselves there's nothing wrong with spending on yourself spend on yourselves i i say to people spend on yourselves honestly i'm very in fact i'm a total you know somebody could say a sucker at that that uh gadgets and these kind of things i i i'm

like like a little kid i see some gadgets and i always buy them and my mates always make fun of me that he just buys anything that comes up as a i say spend on you it is god's gift to you spend it on you what is wealth the hadith says that wealth is what you ma killed what you ate or you drank or you wore what you consumed basically or you gave in charity this is wealth as to everything else then it is

innama it says it is just inheritance you're leaving behind for someone else but do spend but here it's speaking about spending forward giving to people and it mentions in good times but also in bad times remember when things are bad for you they can be equally worse for someone else so it may be a little bit but just always trying to give it's so strange that allah has hidden and this is paradoxical check this out people allah has hidden

contentment and this pleasure of contentment self-contentment contentment of heart in giving forward you would never imagine it all these people we do everything in life and it has pleasures in it don't get me wrong and i'm all for it make money make as much money as you can you know do all these things you want to travel travel you want to enjoy enjoy good and they will bring momentary happiness they will you see happiness there's two there's two main different ways of how people have happiness okay it is either something which is uh

through acquisition happiness okay or it is a gradual um kind of acquired through experience happiness so the acquisition happiness is basically i get something and because i've got it makes me happy you know i buy this now that i've bought it i'm happy this happiness i want a new car i buy a new car i'm happy okay this happiness is a spike it is an acquisition happiness you get something you get now studies will show this will usually last for about three stretches six months three months six

months that's it acquisition happiness doesn't go beyond that you will just become it'll just become normal the other experience is this gradual experiential it's through it's through activities and a it's almost by a journey you acquire it so for example and this could actually be just different kinds of experiences like you developed a skill and it took you a while and you learned it and it brought you some happiness that this happiness tends to stay you for example traveled

you met different people you traveled for a month you traveled for a few months you traveled for half a year you traveled for a year you did something this happiness is a different kind of happiness it's it doesn't go away it's not like the acquisition what's strange is that we most people they they are on this it's called the hedonic treadmill okay this acquisition acquisition acquisition acquisition i want this i want this i want that person i want just be you know if only i i could marry him marry her marry this marry this is still acquisition what

happens is after doing or most people will spend their lives and dying just on this treadmill this hedonic treadmill but those who do make it quite successfully on this treadmill they eventually realize as well that strangely enough the contentment not that these things may have been fun but the contentment the ultimate tranquility has been hidden in helping others and it's like a strange paradoxical truth it doesn't seem to make any sense that why why why would it that what

in giving forward why why on earth would that make me happy but it strangely does it's a strange thing and and i have to say it's it's something muslims really pride our uh you know themselves on because muslims have been by survey one of the most charitable communities but you have to really focus what i would say is focus when you do help this is just my thoughts try not to make it about you trying not to make it about social media okay don't do this kind of okay i'm

gonna help you just one minute can you go and record me whilst i give this to this person and don't do that and can you imagine how it makes that person feel like for god's sake you know in islam they say the scholars would frown that when you give zakat that you even tell the person this is a cut just so it doesn't hurt them because the person is humiliation isn't it that one you're in need the other person this is charity so yeah so here in this verse uh yeah and clearly saying the best feeling ever it

is you know very few things have ever compared to that when i've helped people if i could and sometimes it could be a little something right now they that they spend when they have it when they don't have it so sometimes you're struggling you still do a small bit a small something now this part of the verse is amazing as well

you have is to hold in to contain anger explosive anger they contain it note that allah does not say they don't have it it doesn't say these people don't get angry they do get angry but they can call them in a way

they can contain it that even with anger they refuse to allow it to erupt and in that is a majestic beauty you see not having the ability to get angry is there's nothing special about that every most people will will have that they will get but it's controlling it that is this prophetic quality and mentioned in this verse and notice straight after it it says

because when you hold it in contain it can you forgive them can you let it go it's difficult it is really difficult but believe if you do it allah says will allah it comes you know that thing i said about that happiness it's paradoxical it makes zero sense i give him but i give her and i get happy that doesn't make any sense but it works see this has been hidden in that

it's a paradoxical truth similarly this is of that vein of such vein that by by forgiving you and this do you know what this contributes to that fi the journey that i was saying of the soul of consciousness that soldier that path of its development these things contribute to that you when you forgive well nurse it's an immense it's something else that you feel that

but when you do it there's a different kind of maturity that that emerges a different kind of contentment and a bliss and it's very hard to explain but it's experienced and this is why straight after the karthimin raid allah says and then reminds you and allah loves the people who do essa and you say what is that well this is asan in this ayah you see it is these things that you spend that you even when you when you're struggling you still give forward

you hold back the rage you control it and you forgive that even if the other person is clearly wrong you have enough insight to be that better person to move on and i think this is such an important uh really wallahi one of the most amazing verses of the quran that sums up to me it sums up islam this really just sums it up if people just practice this they would be upstanding role models for humanity the other verse is this

two verses which similarly reflect the same image the same message from surah surah 37 those who avoid and it says deadly sins and immoral acts and we'll have to have a session explaining things like what are sins by the way and it doesn't really mean when there's a difference of opinion but these sins are not talking about okay because the problem is today people

equate a fitty textbook ruling and they you know superimposed that on the quran this is not allah he's not speaking about what the fair of the fukaha kind of sin oh a person says oh you don't trim your tash that's a sin oh you trim your tash that's a sin oh you don't trim the beard that's a sin or you do trim that's the same or you these things are just this is fake speak this is just scholars speaking in their books and sure that may be their opinions but this is not what the quran is speaking about are those sins that that kaba ism that humanity generally

recognizes that cause harm and usually gross harm to to others so it's things of that nature but we'll have to cover that in a different session but people do mix this stuff up because of the word the overlap but then it mentions that what is when they are angry that these people they forgive uh once again one of the most difficult things but it's echoing that same message from surah al-imran and this verse is an interesting one

that what the theorem is now this initially speaking about people of the book but it could speak about anyone that that lawyer do not but what should you do forgive us

it's speaking initially about those primarily about the verses people of the book but by extension it could it covers many aspects including your your ability your faith in how you handle life so for example and by faith here your faith your your positive spirits how you are someone that is that does not get down and does not you know even if momentarily you are saddened by things you bounce back up that is the true spirit of a belief of the faithful that god has gifted you that you have that

people as in this verse people will have envy for that sometimes because they'll think well why is this person so why don't they get down why don't they get depressed why am i always like this and people yeah they want you to almost to kuffar from from this kind of this positivity people want that because they you see because once there's this motto that people don't say but they do it that i suffer we suffer rather if i'm suffering we're all suffering at least we're in it together but i don't want just you know why why

are you okay but i can't handle it so what do you say to these people what do you you know because unfortunately there's a lot of people like that and why are they like that because of those things i mentioned they haven't been developing in the other ways they haven't been focusing on that mental maturity they're still they're kind of grown children they're like i don't know like a man child or a woman child that's what they like and they haven't been developing on the you know the emotional side the maturity

side on the on on the consciousness side they haven't been focusing on that and so these people will oh you know this person i bet they're miserable a bit so what should you do and sometimes people can wrong you like that allah says you see now it's interesting it says fa'afu forgive pardon you pardon them as in in your books but then allah says was foul this is from the same word in arabic as you use for a page and it means to to forgive but in that

sense return a new page why turn a new page because don't let metaphori i mean this is in that in that religious speech don't let the devil win because what it's saying is that you see they've done this but okay you've not acted out that's excellent you've forgiven okay excellent but are you still carrying it as a note mental note if so it's slowing you down as well turn the page let god deal with it

but you would think about khana oh this person wants this person's full of hate they deserve this tiger they do deserve it let god do it you know you stay on your path and i think that such wallahi is such a beautiful verse when we think about it so so eloquently expressed and captured all together and it's and it begins by showing that these people hate what they hate for you they want to turn you into this they want you to disbelieve they want you to lose this this faith this positivity they want you to lose all of these things

but still you not only forgive start a new page and let god deal with it and then allah ends by saying in allah because when you say let god deal with it people say but you know it's not that you don't know it but do you not know allah is all-powerful if he wanted he would have already dealt with it if he hasn't leave it to god are you questioned do you do you feel he can't do it

of course you don't think but it's a reminder so yeah i thought these are some really so um powerfully important lessons and worth going over worth sharing so i want to recover that and we find really from i want to share in in a similar um on this topic moving on to the seerah of the prophet sallallahu alaihi and you see this true embodiment of this verse

from surah we people wanting so much hatred stopping you wanting you to lose your spirit lose that positivity lose that love they want to turn you into this bitter hateful person and you don't but not only do you forgive you turn a new page and then the power of allah does it play out it does may it take time it may may take years it may