Phone conversation on marital rape | Mufti Abu Layth

things I had today check this out well I'll discuss this I mean it's anonymous still I mean it's sanitized if you like names all removed I had a discussion today somebody gave me a call a respected friend now he gave me a call and he was having a discussion amongst certain people and I've discussed this topic before and the topic was marital rape within Islam now this person was I don't know having a discussion with somebody and that person the other

person not my friend but the other person felt that in Islam that felt that legalities aside that okay might be legal illegal whatever depending on whatever part of the world you're in legalities aside but religiously there was no problem in marital rape so this person decided to give me a call and said well look here we are we having this discussion I'd like your understanding what do you believe and would you mind sharing a few words on this so so I did and I said that this is categorically Haram I did bring to their

attention that look I actually have a segment dedicated to this on YouTube where I break down the entire hadith and I show how their hadith are problematic there are not authentic hadith in this back can support such a heinous notion and I and I explained in much more detail however I'll give you guys an overview and I explained that look this is Haram and you can't do things like this and and then we got into a the other person got into a bit of a a dialogue with me a brief dialogue and he said well look I you know with all due

respect and those are the best ones because you know and it's with all due respect that means okay this is with no respect now I'm just joking I'm sure he may have respected me but usually when people say write with all due respect that's usually when they're about to completely this you so he said look I this afternoon spoke to a a musty Urim of the I I is right we got oh yeah

move so he said you're a Mufti but I spoke to a Mufti this afternoon who said look marital rape is not a sin that person said so so this Mufti whoever he is he didn't tell me if the mufti was I said I would love to have a dialogue with this Mufti if I could because you know this is the the problem this is the the goddamn problem of what we are suffering from because it is people that don't recognize that certain things are so out

of date that they are simply just regurgitating like maybe evil for tower based on not based on pure or an wasana but just based on the mindset of the age which was just patriarchal so I said well that's ridiculous of course it's Haram and we said well you know can you quote me a single hadith to say that it is Haram I said I can do much better than that I'll quote you the Quran

I said let's begin with the Quran where Allah says were are she Runa Bill Maher oof that you live with them that you are sure is to live together as in cohabit with them with kindness that's a command so are you suggesting that what like rape is it fits into how does it fit into that and the quizzes it no I said on all carry-on voila una mezcla the Elena bill models

that they have rights you have rights as a person they have rights I said Allah says in surah khumba ma Ruthie notice Ariane BSN now you either live together in kindness oh you part ways harmoniously gracefully this is a verse of the Quran la caja 15 there is no compulsion in Islam now and this went a bit back and forth and verses it well look you know the person you know the mufti said to me that you know this is in Islam and it's okay it's not a sin

I said look first of all that I know he goes you don't know what the person is basing his ruling I said I do the person is basing his ruling on a hadith that is transmitted in bihari in Muslim in dar me now this hadith I said I've actually completely dissected this it's already on YouTube but it mainly rests on two problematic narrators on kitada and on alarm OSH both are massively problematic these were narrators who used to black at times that some of the things they would put they would kind of

mislead people in having chains like pretending that they've heard something from somebody when it's just hearsay they haven't actually heard it directly so katate for example he transmits abu dawood said that he transmitted from 30 people at least this is from many but at least 30 people who had never actually directly ever heard anything from but he pretended he'd heard from them directly at least 30 people and with allah mush

at least 20 people from one of those 20 over a hundred hadith he he pretends he's heard from him from him but he hasn't now i said look these hadith and even like look this hadith it's a very famous one that oh if the husband calls the wife too to bed and she doesn't come then the Angels curse her till morning this is a false hadith but even if you took that hadith you try to no I'm gonna believe in this and take this literally I think first of all it's utterly disappointing that

you're doing that but even if you did I want to highlight something we're in the hadith did does it say that you could forcefully have sex where does it say that it doesn't even the evidence that you trying to use which really is a false hadith but even though you're trying to use it where does it say that that's that that's okay so it's amazing that and this the kind of mindset and I said to this person the person said to me look you know there's certain things that people do and he's part of life like certain relationships and things

and like he's trying to intimacy and I said well look here's a I said he's a an analogy I said look you eat food don't you I said if somebody was to shove food down not to misunderstand my analogy here but I said if somebody was to just open your mouth and shove food in right right is is that it would you be okay with this just because well hey well you eat anyway so how about you open that mouth and just force-feed you because you eat anyway isn't it so wouldn't you

consider that harm wouldn't you consider that Haram wouldn't you consider and the person said well you know the person said well if a person's ill you gotta feed them anyway and I was like it's this analogy going oh so were you going somewhere with that analogy it's like huh if a person's ill you've got to feed them anyway where are we now

so yeah so it's uh it's really disappointing actually and it was interesting because I said to the person and I don't like to look I don't know the person but and I said to the person and I don't and I don't like to personalize things with people but sometimes you know you you you mentioned something as an example just to make it kind of resonate so I said I said look I don't know who you are I don't know for example whether you have children or not but let's just say if hypothetically it

was your own daughter would you be okay with somebody forcefully raping her like that and he said well look he said look you're using words like that but I would say if it's not a sin then you know I if it's not a sin then and then okay um well like I was shocked and I said well I think you have abysmally failed as a father then and and he said well you

know I think and I said and I'm disappointed that you would say that being a father and he said well I think you failed as a Mufti I don't know what the hell that comparison was and I said well I'd rather failed 100 times as a Mufti then fail as a father in being content with what rape of my own daughter what kind of a I said that is the you stooped as low as anybody could possibly stew so I said I'd happily fail as a Mufti rather than fail as a father

so but this mindset is the problem okay this mindset is the issue that for some reason people feel that look they they kind of regurgitated things and I said look and I made this clear I said rook whatever you do people in relationships there's ups downs people have incentives motivations you know they try to keep a relationship going they might emotionally blackmail each other in relationships you know people might refuse to give each other the cold

shoulder or not talk to each other or but and people do all kinds of things and that's their business right that's their business it's their relationship however the problem is that blackmailing somebody by using God by using Allah and His Messenger that's the problem see this mindset needs to change that if you are going to be let's say low that you're going to emotionally blackmail someone firstly if that's the situation then you shouldn't be in that relationship anyway but let's say you're

gonna stoop that low to do something like that you shouldn't be using God to justify okay you shouldn't be kind of saying well using the messenger of allah to blackmail somebody so that's I feel personally I feel it's a betrayal to Islam so that's that's my thoughts on that