# What should a couple agree before marriage about registering and money? *Before marrying: an honest conversation, registration or independence, and women working* - URL: https://muftiabulayth.org/r/zs1rln2djss/s/5/ - Date: 2018-03-05 · Kind: lesson · Transcript tier: machine · Recording: Zina, Marriage and Relationships - Mufti Abu Layth al-Maliki (18:10–22:06) - Status: general teaching - Watch from the start of the segment: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zs1rLN2Djss&t=1090s - Recording page: https://muftiabulayth.org/r/zs1rln2djss/ **Topics:** Marriage; Women in Islam; The marriage contract **Summary (not a quotation; machine-made, unchecked):** Have an open conversation before marriage about registration and finances, and if the marriage is not registered the woman should keep her own work, income and property. Saying a woman may not work is cultural and backward, not Islam. **Checked position (checked by two independent reviews, not by the channel):** Mufti Abu Layth advises an open conversation before marriage about registration and finances, encourages women to keep independent income and property, and condemns as cultural and un-Islamic the attitude that a woman may not work. **Evidence, his words at 20:28:** “woman wants to work or if a woman wants this that she's not allowed to have that or she can't do this that is backwards it is nothing to do with Islam it is cultural” (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zs1rLN2Djss&t=1228s) ## Longer summary Mufti Abu Layth says he accepts both sides of the argument and that the two positions repel each other, so his advice is a very open conversation before marriage: a person who insists on registration should say so and the other party will agree or not. If the other party refuses to register and wants a relationship and shared family life without it, he says the woman can make clear that she will continue her individual life, work, and keep her own money or a portion of it to invest, for instance buying a property to rent out as a separate income, which he encourages because it keeps her independent and leaves her with a home and an income should things fall apart. He condemns the attitude that a woman may not work or have these things as backward, cultural and nothing to do with Islam, noting that in rural Pakistan the great majority of women work in the fields, and says the objection is an insecurity in the man. He adds that he does understand men's suspicion that a partner might leave after a year and claim half their property, while calling such suspicions unhealthy for a society. The segment ends as a question about anabolic steroids is read out. ## Transcript (machine tier, 18:10–22:06) [17:55] there's me in 20 years of a relationship and you could not I did not I like I've refused or that you should go and work and develop for yourself then now we end the relationship what do you have that's also a wrong so I accept that I accept both sides to the argument but the problem is both of these are so how do they fit because they both kind of like they're repelling the magnetism is repelling people so how do we so I would say look before you are about to get [18:32] married right you can have a very open conversation with the other person if you are adamant that you want this registered you can make it clear either the person will agree or they won't that's one way the other way when are you going to compete ruts Rock missions I don't even know what that is all right so the other the other side is that if the other person is not prepared to register the relation the marriage the person says look I just want a relationship we can live together [19:10] we can be one family but I don't want to register because I'm against this kind of concept then you can make it clear I feel that you can make it very clear that look you will still continue to live your individual life as well that you will work like if you want to work you will work that you will keep your money to invest towards yourself as well so if a woman wants to keep her money or let's say keep a portion of her money that she will always invest so let's say some women they could be married but she could say look I want to buy a house separately or mining I want to put that [19:48] on rent and I want to you know that will be my separate income alhamdulillah I think that is a bridge an idea I encourage those kind of ideas because this will keep you as a woman independent you are not dependent on the man yes you are together you're working together you're both contributing but should things fall out you can go your way you can go his way you've got you know you've got something you've got a stable place you've got you've got a property you've got an income you've got things so what I'm trying to say is I [20:28] think they can be an honest conversation at the beginning of a relationship to say look this is what I want and then you can negotiate what I do condemn is I condemn those that approach that attitude that some people have that if a woman wants to work or if a woman wants this that she's not allowed to have that or she can't do this that is backwards it is nothing to do with Islam it is cultural and it's not even truly cultural of places like Pakistan because even in Pakistan which the majority of which is rural the vast majority of all [21:07] rural women go out and work and they work in the fields they do the crops they do all these things I've witnessed it with my own eyes so to say that women can't go out or they shouldn't go out is backwards that is an insecurity that lies with you but I do accept the fact that some men are they would be concerned that look like this is something I've had that if I if I go register something - how do I not know this isn't just for my you know you're not just in this relationship 13 months from today you could be in court saying you want half of my property and you want half of this and then you just want [21:46] to enjoy that really with somebody else now these suspicions in these societies they're not good suspicions to have but I do understand that people have these suspicions okay next question Harley they are married to your judges I've got no idea on anabolic steroids permissible steroids are an issue of legality and not an issue of theology they are haram but they are an issue of legality in the West Bank they work there as well I was there for a while it's great to hear Cameron I agree that and this is just insecurities that certain people have and I think that's Harley you're gonna get blocked enough of the TED talk ## Cite Mufti Abu Layth Archive, segment Zs1rLN2Djss/s/5. https://muftiabulayth.org/r/zs1rln2djss/s/5/ Not a fatwa: these answers were given to specific people at specific times. Ask a qualified scholar about your own situation.