# Can a husband or father force a woman to wear hijab? *Coercing women to cover: male insecurity and religious guilt* - URL: https://muftiabulayth.org/r/trr4o2jzizc/s/3/ - Date: 2019-11-03 · Kind: lesson · Transcript tier: machine · Recording: Verse in Surah Al-Nur about the Hijab | Mufti Abu Layth (11:49–17:02) - Status: general teaching - Watch from the start of the segment: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRR4o2JZIZc&t=709s - Recording page: https://muftiabulayth.org/r/trr4o2jzizc/ **Topics:** Hijab and niqab; Masculinity and gender roles; Women in Islam **Summary (not a quotation; machine-made, unchecked):** Forcing women to cover their hair is categorically wrong in Mufti Abu Layth's view and does greater harm. He attributes the pressure to men's insecurity about women and to guilt imposed through fatwas that curse men whose wives do not cover, both of which he calls wrong. **Checked position (checked by two independent reviews, not by the channel):** Mufti Abu Layth holds that for men to coerce women into covering their hair is categorically wrong and does greater harm, and that the pressure to do so comes from male insecurity about women and from guilt imposed through fatwas, both of which he calls inaccurate and wrong. **Evidence, his words at 11:49:** “but to enforce that to kind of coerce people that would in my understanding be categorically wrong category wrong and you'd be doing much greater harm in my understanding” (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRR4o2JZIZc&t=709s) ## Longer summary Mufti Abu Layth says it is not for men to force women to cover their hair: a man may hold the opinion, but coercing people would in his understanding be categorically wrong and do far greater harm. He says the problem has two sides. One is insecure men who cannot handle women being seen, who treat a woman as either wrapped up in bubble wrap or a prostitute, which he mocks as ridiculous and calls an embarrassing weakness in which what men lack within they try to impose without. The other is that some such people reach positions of power and guilt-trip others through fatwas, telling men that a wife walking around uncovered makes them a cuckold, that it is haram and an abomination and that God's curse descends on them, so that other men enforce covering on wives, sisters and daughters out of fear of being cursed. After an aside asking the chat to watch its language, he calls this religious burden of guilt sickening and those who impose it sick, says both the insecurity and the guilt are inaccurate and wrong, and says this is the problem with institutionalisation, which produces hypocrisy and guilt that Islam never came to produce. ## Sources and names cited - hijab ## Transcript (machine tier, 11:49–17:02) [11:30] wasn't wearing the hijab I would feel that that opinion equally has validity so and these are people's personal journeys through the faith it's not for other people really to impose that on people you know and it's not really it's not really for for men to to say to women that you should be covering your hair when you go out and you should be too as in to force it I mean they could say well I believe you should be okay fine that's your opinion but to enforce that to kind of coerce people that would [12:10] in my understanding be categorically wrong category wrong and you'd be doing much greater harm in my understanding and I think sometimes that it's it's my fault it's it's got two angles to it there is the angle that sometimes these men are then under guilt because they feel that the religion says that she has to cover this because what happens is you have these other scholars who give these fatwas because I said this is I feel into five fold it's got to you know sides to it there is one side where people are just insecure men and that I [12:49] think personally I think it's it's their personal it's an embarrassing weakness but many people suffer from it they have you know many men are very insecure about about women especially women that they with that if you oh my god oh my god nobody oh my gosh woman guys looking at this woman oh my god oh no she's gonna run away oh no she's gonna have they have this thing where they treat like Oh Mike if a woman isn't fully covered up then she must it must just be [13:26] like full Baraka or it must just be prostitute oh bloody hell it's like either she's like absolutely wrapped up in I don't know in duct tape and in bubble wrap what's it called my robot Oliver is right she's either covered up in bubble wrap or she's from the horse of Babylon there's just two [14:05] different mcoms that's it right beekeeper suits yeah exactly so the this is ridiculous now so you do get a lot of people that are very insecure and so they they want the women to be covered up because they can't handle the woman out there as in they feel oh my god even if a man looks at you that means what the hell you know they feel inept and this is a weakness and a lacking within they don't feel like real men oh you know because it's [14:45] true they lack within so what they lack within they try to make without you know that so there's that and then what you have is some of these people get into positions of power these insecure people and they then guilt-trip other people so they say any guy whose wife is walking around without without her hair covered is a the youth and he's he's like a cuckold and he's you know it's Haram what he's doing is Haram and an [15:22] abomination and God's Lana is descending upon him and so you have this kind of cocktail of insecurity mixed with guilt riddled with guilt so some guys would probably feel really guilty thinking oh my god I'm being cursed by God so because of that they were right people watch your language please I don't know somebody responding to somebody else no [15:59] profanity only I exclusively hold the right to that on my own on my own live session right so the so people some guys feel if I don't tell my wife to wear this or my sister or my daughter or my whatever then I'm being cursed so that so they're doing this out of a kind of a religious burdensome guilt and that is sickening and the people who are burdening them with that are sick as [16:37] well all they're doing it out of this kind of insecurity so I feel both of these things are inaccurate and wrong and this is why you know this is the problem with some of this institutionalization it produces just hypocrisy oh it produces guilt and Islam never came to do any of these things you know your Deen I say this time and time again look your Deen your where this this theme of Islam as the Prophet said Adi know yourself this theme is one of ease this Deen should complement your lifestyle people ## Cite Mufti Abu Layth Archive, segment TRR4o2JZIZc/s/3. https://muftiabulayth.org/r/trr4o2jzizc/s/3/ Not a fatwa: these answers were given to specific people at specific times. Ask a qualified scholar about your own situation.