# Why do people get so upset about Islamic rulings on sex?

*Why do sex-related fatwas trigger people? Legitimate difference, a culture of shame, and no shyness in learning*

- URL: https://muftiabulayth.org/r/housirokbvu/s/26/
- Date: 2020-04-19 · Kind: discussion · Transcript tier: machine · Recording: Shaykh Kashif Khan | Policing thought, Pornography & Pandora's box | MindTrap with Mufti #15 (2:13:27–2:21:08)
- Status: a view quoted in order to be discussed, not a position held
- Watch from the start of the segment: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hOusirOkBVU&t=8007s
- Recording page: https://muftiabulayth.org/r/housirokbvu/

**Topics:** Sexual ethics; Schools of law and following them; Guest conversations

**Summary (not a quotation; machine-made, unchecked):** The guest blames a culture of shame in the subcontinent, and says the classical scholars and al-Bukhari show there is no shyness in learning the religion and that legitimate differences cannot be denounced.

## Longer summary

Mufti Abu Layth asks why rulings on sexual matters trigger people far more than other disagreements, such as the Maliki view that one may pray at times others call forbidden. The guest says people ask him genuinely and he gives the differing opinions and evidence, and when asked his own view says he has found no evidence either way; he cites Imam al-Shafi'i that one cannot denounce someone who holds nabidh halal, music not haram or mut'ah halal, since these are legitimate differences. He says people raised in Pakistan and India are fed a culture of shame in which women cannot even name menstruation or pregnancy, use euphemisms, are looked down on for walking out while pregnant, and hide eating during Ramadan when not fasting. He says the classical scholars openly discussed questions such as placing the mushaf on a bed where intercourse took place, which Ibn Abbas [?] said was no harm, and that al-Bukhari's book of knowledge cites Mujahid that the shy and the arrogant cannot learn, and the report of a woman asking the Prophet directly about her menstruation, to show there is no shyness in learning the religion.

## Sources and names cited

- Shaykh Kashif Khan (guest)
- al-Shafi'i
- nabidh
- mut'ah
- Maliki school
- Ibn Abbas [?]
- report: ibn abbas there is no harm in placing the mushaf on the bed where intercourse took place
- mushaf
- Imam al-Bukhari
- Sahih al-Bukhari (Kitab al-Ilm)
- Mujahid ibn Jabr
- report: two do not learn the shy person and the arrogant
- report: a woman came to the prophet and asked directly about her menstruation

## Transcript (machine tier, 2:13:27–2:21:08)

[2:12:46] this argument that people will say that I am NOT legitimizing it but I couldn't find any evidence of prohibition so if I couldn't find evidence how can I hurt her arm like it's not my pet religion so that I can say whatever I want exactly so mean so you you you response to that is that you saying well the basically this is it's it's God's religion even if even if that thing doesn't feel well

[2:13:23] with us but it's not our like we're not licensed to make things how long yeah of course people say you are making things a lot okay so what about you're making things around you inside of Iran as well making me halal or Haram it's not like it can only be done on the light of evidence why do you think people are like you know you said about back pointing brakes the fast and I believe his opinion but let's say like this you get other opinions which you can tell people for example like let's say there was a different masala but still a fee

[2:14:01] it's quite free like white art Wow but people can kind of like okay I don't accept it but okay you've said this fatwa but why is it these kind of fatah wa do you feel that it really triggers people because these kind of Futaba really trigger people like this you know like let's say this thing of pornography masturbation oral sex anal these kind of things are seen as why are they seen as vile and disgusting whereas there could be other like let's say for example these things like which people think are haram but you said no I don't think

[2:14:40] that's Haram because based on this it doesn't trigger people in the same way did you get what I'm saying [ __ ] oh why do you think this is but what a lot of people ask me these questions right and they are genuine they have they genuinely feels these things and they asked it so I always tell them that there is a difference of opinion and this is this opinion of Delta scholars this is the opinion data scholar right and this is the evidence and if someone asked him what my opinion is as though so I tell them that I couldn't find out any evidence which says it's halal or which to assess Haram I just tell him because these are the questions

[2:15:18] generally asked for the people and Imam Shafi'i he said if someone is is of the view of no beef is halal or under Sections not Haram or music is not Haram or or mata is halal you can not say to him that he is making Haram as a large you cannot say to him that he's making and he cannot say to them that they are making Haram has an Alan halal and halal and Haram and we cannot rebuke them we cannot denounce that because these are the things which are legit which have legitimate difference of opinion of them

[2:15:55] is difference of opinion on the is this in his own yeah but why do you why do you think people are so triggered by this topic more than other topics like why is it that you know like so for example certain topics even though people think it's Haram but you said like let's say somebody said for example it's haram to pray the huh in the world time is haram to pray anything as a well time because of this hadith but then the Maliki method says no so well time is fine you can pray

[2:16:34] like it's not gonna trigger people like people won't be all triggered just because you disagreed on that Haram issue but on anything sex related is it really triggers people why do you think that is [ __ ] what's the hope you know people have been fed so much you know they have grown in an environment with these things considered a stable you cannot in Pakistan India like women cannot even say that we are having menses they cannot even name it

[2:17:09] you can imagine I don't know different names or even pregnancy like they say sometimes like she's ill they would say about a woman she's ill be mother I supposed to mean she's she's pregnant isn't that like because it's seen as like oh my it is like that even if

[2:17:49] they're pregnant if they are go out for a walk or even if they go for a normal work even if they are not pregnant they look down upon that wide open are is going out and this is the mentality of the people you know regarding you said about menses and the fasting that during Ramadan like women who are not fasting because they because if they cook at home let's say the name is see they're cooking but it's women or let's say they see this woman drinking something or what they would because by

[2:18:25] that the other people and this is an

[2:18:30] embarrassment this is you know

[2:19:15] imagine if like the scholars the classiest callers who have discussed about oh oh my god the tongue is used to read that can we read can we place the mood up and read over the same bed where we had sex who said this abdullah bin a bath can we read the muthaf but they think on the same must have by placing the musa on the same bed where we have intercourse

[2:19:53] he said there is no harm in that you can do them there's no harm in that so you're typing and they have these things in their head like you don't want to hear about this otherwise I don't see and one more thing Imam Bukhari in his capable ill he has brought the first narration he brought from the Kaaba I think it was a mom who chahid that 2% cannot take learn and seek knowledge one is a shy person and the other one who is ignorant and and this is narration from imam moussa head

[2:20:31] he brought a narration from the from Moscow hadith where a Sahaba she goes to the Prophet and ask about her menstruation cycle directly Prophet SAW Imam Bukhari he is trying to prove in kitab incapable ill that there is no shyness there is no you don't have to be shy you don't have to you know ayah when you ask learning the religion this is what religion is so so it's people they are shy in learning in Jami ABI bakr once we had a menorah we had a debate in the in the between the students about

## Cite

Mufti Abu Layth Archive, segment hOusirOkBVU/s/26. https://muftiabulayth.org/r/housirokbvu/s/26/

Not a fatwa: these answers were given to specific people at specific times. Ask a qualified scholar about your own situation.